i just ordered a pitcher of margaritas for me and a friend but she called and canceled. oh well, looks like im getting trashed alone.
the waiter who hardly speaks english told me "i go get your medicine now"
this medicine is soooo good.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
