Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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