YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
did i just pee glitter
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
