ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Of course I have a pirate flag
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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