Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize