A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
