I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
