Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
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