I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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