Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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