everyone is single if you try hard enough
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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