You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
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