You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
