If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
