his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Randomize
