i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
