You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
