Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
