He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Randomize
