The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize