he thought i was a dude.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize