Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Randomize