Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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