hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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