I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
