one two three fourrrrnication!
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
