he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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