Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
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