Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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