I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
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