my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
