i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
