oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
