Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Randomize