I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
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I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
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I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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