dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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