Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Randomize
