No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
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