Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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