Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Randomize
