i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Randomize
