After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
This is classic penis vs brain.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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