She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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