I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
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