shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
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