Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Randomize
