The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
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