A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
