your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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