that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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